Everything turned out!!

Today turned out alright....

I set my alarm for 6am to get up for work, well I didn't get up til about 5 of 7am and I had to leave for work at 7am to be there by 730am, I wanted to stop at Turkey Hill in Etown and well they weren't open yet, I was so angry cuz I wanted to get a drink, then I get to work and clock in, my supervisor, Russ, he's like "do you want the day off?" I was so surprised, and I was like "are you serious?!" he's told me that he was. He's like "Merry Christmas, its my Christmas gift for you!" he asked me if I was clock-in and told him that I was and he's like "I'll clock you out at 3pm or 330pm" I was getting paid time and a half for not working!! He told me that I'll have off for all three next year.
I was SO excited that I went home and went back to bed and woke up at 10am. When I woke up I was still tired and felt like staying in my bed all day, but I decided to have Christmas with my dad and stepmom....So I called them this morning and told them that I can make it for lunch, so headed over there about noon, had lunch, played games, and opened gifts.....I must say I do miss hanging out with my dad every day, like the good old days.....For once I actually enjoyed myself today....I stopped over at my g-rents and wished them a Merry Christmas since I missed lunch at there place yesterday(sat)...I love them so much!!

found out that a good neighbor of mine when I lived at my old place passed away a few days ago...He was an awesome person...

I remember when I was younger, we'd have breakfast then head down stairs to open our gifts as a family after that we'd head over to my g-rents that lived next door to us for lunch and opened gifts there....I miss being a kid again....lol

I got like 5 pairs of socks, shampoo(I get shampoo from them every year), 3 gift cards from my dad and stepmom, oh yea I also got a LONGABERGER BASKET!! Its my 3rd one, I'm so excited!! Can you tell?? lol...I'm digging the turtle socks!!! I've always loved turtles, especially the little ones, their so adorable.....


so my Christmas turned out awesome!!

oh Sheetz had FREE, yes FREE coffee today, every Christmas they have FREE coffee....So after I left from my dads I went to Sheetz to get a cappuccino for FREE, not a single penny!!! I was so excited... I love the French Vanilla.....My day just got better and better as the day went on.

well i think thats all for now.....gotta head to bed...im so tired and full from lunch...it was like a feast!!! lol....later

Christmas Eve Eve Service

The Christmas Eve Eve service was A-MAZING!!!! I love the song Angus Dei.......

alleluia, alleluia
For the lord God almighty reigns
Alleluia, alleluia
For the lord God almighty reigns
Alleluia
Holy, holy are you lord God almighty
Worthy is the lamb
Worthy is the lamb
You are holy, holy are you lord God almighty
Worthy is the lamb
Worthy is the lamb
Amen

Oh and Matt Goss has WAY too much time on his hands with that video they showed.....

i wont see any of my family at all for Christmas, i have work for the next 14 freakin days!! seriously....looks like i wont be traveling South to NC to see my cousin and has wife and Austin, their son....i've only seen video and pictures of him....i miss them so much....

my dad finally called me today....he's having family over on sunday but i cant make that either as well as my grandparents on Saturday, cuz of work....yuck!!

Christmas is different for me this year.......














I've been thinking about this for a while now....it gets me thinking for once, jk.....ok heres a question.....im gonna try to word it as best as i can.......
after you die, you go up into Heaven, right, do you stay the same age that you died and are cured of every disease and illness or do you get older and you still are cured of every disease and illness?? i dont know why i've been thinking about that lately, but i have....i guess i was thinking of someone special...idk.....kind of a stupid question....i dont know why i even wrote it on here.............


alright that was a stupid question!! lol

8 years today

well today is 8 years since my mom passed...seems like yesterday, i can remember everything that happened that day.....crappy day for me.....but im lookin at the positive things that she taught me.....i loved her and i still do....one day i'll get to see her face.....

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I announce here in and forever more that I am a part of the church of the out of control. I am a disciple of Jesus Christ. I've given up control to the Spirit. I've surrendered control to God. I've jumped off the fence. I've stepped over the line. There is no turning back, looking around, slowing down, backing away, letting up or shutting up. It's life played against the odds., outside the box, over the wall. The game of life played without goal lines other than "Thy will be done."

I'm done primping and pimping for the over dogs, the wonder dogs, and the lapdogs. I'm done playing by the rules whether it's Roberts's Rules of Order or Martha Stewart's Rules of Homemaking or Merrill Lynch's Rules of the money minding and bottom-lining ladder climbing. I am not here to please the dominant culture or to serve any buck stops nowhere bureaucrats.

I am here to please my Lord and my Savior. This means that sometimes I am called to sharpen the cutting edge and sometimes to blunt the cutting edge. This means that I'm finished with second hand sensations; third rate dreams low risk high-risk trades and goose-stepping, flag waving crusades. I no longer need applause, approval, and affluence.

I now live by God-breathed love. Christ centered faith and Spirit driven power. My face is upward. My feet are outward. My eyes are focused. My way is cloudy. My knees are worn. My seat uncreased. My heart burdened. My spirit light. My road narrow. My mission wide. I can't be bought by any personalities or perks, positions or prizes.

I won't give up, though I might easily give into openness of mind, humbleness of heart, and generosity of spirit. In the face of adversity no longer will I hang in there. I will stand in there, I will run in there, I will pray in there, I will sacrifice in there, I will endure in there. I will do everything in fact, except hang.

I won't be seduced by popularity, traduced by criticism, travestied by hypocrisy, or trivialized by mediocrity. I've stopped trying to make things work and started trying to make things sing.
I am the institutionalized Church's best friend and worst nightmare. I won't back down, slow down, shut down, or let down, until I'm preached out, teached out, healed out, or hauled out of God's mission that has been entrusted to all of us to unbind the confined whether they're overlooked, the unrepresented, the down trodden, or the upscale.

My fundamental indentity is a disciple of Jesus--but even more a disciple of Jesus who lives in Christ. Who seeks to travel through history not just simply "In His steps" but more deeply and more intimately "In His Spirit." I must go until he comes, give till I drop, preach till I know all, and work till he stops--till He comes again or calls me home. I can be found not killing time but filling time. So that one day He will pick me out of the line-up of the aged as one of his own. And then....It will be worth it all--to hear the most precious words I could ever hear, "Well done, thy good and faithful, servant."

Random

since im updating so much now i dont know what to write in here....Christmas is almost here, i cant believe it.....since we got like 6 inces of snow recently, i love to drive my explorer through the snow...its so much better than my "blue beast!!" lol.....i miss that car, okay not really...right now im on painkillers for my wrist and tuesday i go back to the doctors, its not getting better and yea the painkillers are working but i dont wanna become addicted to them, that just wont be good...

Recently i've been getting up like 30 minutes before i have to leave for work because im so cold and wanna stay cuddled up in my nice, warm bed....friday i'll get to sleep in bcoz i dont work friday!! yes!!! im so excited.....a 3 day weekend for me, but im gonna spend some time thinking about life and family....and i have to write my dad a Christmas card, havent talked to him in a while....well thats it

I'm OUT!!!






Sunny days seem to hurt the most.
I wear the pain like a heavy coat.
The only thing that gives me hope,
Is I know I'll see you again some day.

You just can't do it!!

Discovering everything that i've done in the past 2 months or so has really gotten me thinking. How could i have been so stupid to deal with stress that way. i realized now that its not a very good way to deal with it, so now that i have a new work schedule and have off the weekends now, i feel less stressed. I still get my days where its stressful but i talk to my supervisor about it and then he helps me throughout the day to make sure i dont flipout on anyone.

So im giving everything up to God, cuz i cant do it on my own anymore, i've tried and failed, i ran away for so long and came back. You can't do life on your own, just incase no one knew that. lol. i regret doing what i did, totally.....i cant believe that i did that.

Call you up in the middle of the night
Like a firefly without a light
You were there like a slow torch burning
I was a key that could use a little turning

So tired that I couldn't even sleep
So many secrets I couldn't keep
Promised myself I wouldn't weep
One more promise I couldn't keep

It seems no one can help me now
I'm in too deep
There's no way out
This time I have really led myself astray

CHORUS
Runaway train never going back
Wrong way on a one way track
Seems like I should be getting somewhere
Somehow I'm neither here no there

Can you help me remember how to smile
Make it somehow all seem worthwhile
How on earth did I get so jaded
Life's mystery seems so faded

I can go where no one else can go
I know what no one else knows
Here I am just drownin' in the rain
With a ticket for a runaway train

Everything seems cut and dry
Day and night, earth and sky
Somehow I just don't believe it

CHORUS
Bought a ticket for a runaway train
Like a madman laughin' at the rain
Little out of touch, little insane
Just easier than dealing with the pain

Runaway train never comin' back
Runaway train tearin' up the track
Runaway train burnin' in my veins
Runaway but it always seems the same



awesome song^^^^ Runaway train by Soul Asylum